Thursday, September 08, 2005

Left Behind

Have you ever been stuck in a phase of your life, seeing no end or relief ahead? I feel like God is trying to teach me something, and has been trying to teach me this certain lesson for a long time. I must be a really slow learner, because I feel like I'm not moving. People around me are--they apparently had no problem learning their lesson . They are graduating from college, getting married, finding good jobs, serving the Lord in the ministry, having kids, etc. etc. I know God's plans are different for each person, and His timing is perfect. I just wonder if it is my fault that I'm still way back here on this lesson when every one else has moved ahead. Have I just really messed up one too many times and missed out on God's will? Maybe this is my punishment. Always seeking something and waiting for it, and never having it.

I guess the reason this is such a struggle for me is that I feel like I am wasting time. I know I'm not going to be who I am now and doing what I'm doing for the rest of my life. I need to just be content and wait on God; but at the same time, I wonder if I'm not doing something right, and that's causing me to have these feelings of uncertainty.

Really, I think it all boils down to fear of the unknown. The fact of the matter is, we are typically scared of what we don't know. I don't know what my life will be like in 6 months or 1 year, or 5 years. I guess, to a certain degree, that uncertainty will always be there, but when you are already married and have your family, it seems like that fear wouldn't always be in the front of your mind.

I need to just enjoy life today, and make today count, and not worry about the future. God will keep His promises. There is no need to worry.

Sorry for all the randomness today. I have basically just been writing these things as I was thinking them. You can clearly see the battle between flesh and the spirit!

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's kinda weird that you put this out on your blog cuz we were just talking about this in Sunday school. The teacher mentioned that the majority of the time we look at God's chastening in our lives as something being taken away from us. But in reality, a lot of times, God is just withholding good things from us that He so longs to give us. The hard thing is owning up to what God wants us to change in our lives so that He CAN richly bless us. Hang in there! God hasn't given up on us yet! ;)

Kc said...

You're in my prayers.

Corry said...

Kristi, your perspective of what is happening and going on with you is amazing. Few people ever like to look at or examine themselves or recognize it and tend to blame someone else for what is or is not happening with/to them. I think you are way ahead and on the verge to resolving all this. You go, girl:-)

I think almost everyone at one point, got/gets where you are now. I know I have:-) Most of it would prolly also be impatience. You like things to be the way you would want or envision them for yourself, especially seeing everyone else moving forward.

Try not to make the mistake to force things ahead, nothing good can come from that. You already stated you would count your blessing, enjoy things God gave you and wait for Him, but try also to look for the doors He opens for you and take the opportunities He gives you. Like you said, it comes down to fear. Fear may have caused you to leave those doors closed. I am sure God will open new doors for you. They may not always be what you would want or expected. God works in mysterious ways:-)Look for them and step through them in/with faith.

I learned that the uncertainty can be eliminated for a huge part by this:
1) Always do what you know is best
2) Don't do what you know is wrong
3) And if you don't know what to do, do nothing, just pray and have faith.
The uncertainty that remains after that, may be a good thing. It causes you to look at, question and judge yourself before you do one of the three things mentioned above.

I hope this helps a little. You are in my prayers:-)

God's Grace.

Kristi B. said...

Thanks so much everyone! Wow, so much encouragement and support is overwhelming.

Corry, those points for eliminating uncertainty are great! Thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

The bible says, "Be still, and know that I am God". Rev. 1:8 says, "I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Almighty."
We will always be faced with uncertainty, but we should like at it positively. If we are honest with ourselves, we as human beings do not like to feel uncertain, especially about what paths we should take in our lives. We always want to be sure, have no doubts. When doubt creeps in about a situation, it is easy to start to question God. He says, "Be still...and KNOW..." God knows what has happened, what is happening, and what will happen. He knows all of us by our first name. "...and they shall hear MY voice..." We need to be still and listen to that still, small voice. We follow God by faith. Remember the illustration, about sitting in a chair, knowing it will hold us. We do it by faith. We are certain it will hold us. We should be certain, that God will not leave us nor forsake us. Why? He said He wouldn't. It should be that simple, right? I know it isn't, God knows we will have doubts. That is why He gave us His Word. He proves Himself faithful, all the time.
When you are uncertain, i know i have been, know that God's promises are certain. When you feel lost, listen for his voice. He is the Great Shepherd, and you can know you are not "Left Behind."

Kristi B. said...

Marquese, Welcome, and thanks for the comment. Very good reminder and spoken just like the preacher that you know you are! =)